A short defence of talking about big questions with strangers

There is a question I keep coming back to: Do you think people can really change?

Most of our conversations are polite traffic. "Busy week?" "Yes, mad." "Same." We do it because it is safe. But I think a lot of us are hungry for the other kind: the kind where somebody asks what you actually believe, and then waits for the answer.

There is a strange thing about strangers: they are sometimes easier to be honest with. They do not know your history. They have not already decided who you are. You can try out an idea without your old self standing in the corner rolling its eyes.

So here is my answer, for what it is worth. I think people change, but slowly, and usually not because someone argued them into it. They change because someone they like showed them another way to live, and did not make a big deal of it. Which is, when you think about it, a very good argument for having more friends.

I could be wrong. That is the fun part.

If you are the kind of person who would rather talk about free will than the weather, tick "Someone to think out loud with" when you write. One day I would like to see a few of you introduced to each other: people who would happily argue over coffee, or over a video call, for three hours.

This week's question: What is something you believed at 18 that you do not believe now? Put your answer in your letter, if you like. Odd answers are welcome here.